Two timing


I walked into the Bar around 6, chowed on some food, sipped on an Amp Focus and mentally prepared myself for the worst.

My favorite watering hole in the last few very dark months of my fifth and final “drunk” as they say in meetings, a “bender” that was one endless night, also employed my favorite bartender ever: Green. Green, known for his savage fandom of the Boston Celtics and the fishhook in his hat is a hilarious country boy from Wisconsin. I had last seen him zonked out on some wack combination of synthetic cannabis and Xanax and Jim Beam last year when it was freezing outside.

Seasons change. He heard through the grapevine that I wasn’t drinking anymore and wound up bringing in his bartenders from the Bar to the Pub, and there he asked me to bartend one night (and I picked up a day shift as well)

I didn’t know what to expect so I consulted my mentor and all around bar goddess Dawn for advice. Showed up dressed up in Express from head to toe and loved that customers could feel our energy as we ‘vibed’ off each other, a true high class/white trash combo.

The customers loved me and almost everyone asked when I was coming back. Green wound up crying over the Celtics losing (BOOO! moment of silence) and then proceeded to kill the Sambuca and the American Honey.

I rearranged all of the speed rails and shelves and coolers and service bar and….well, everything. I got cussed out repeatedly in good humor because the cocktail waitresses couldn’t find diddly 😉 because, forbid it, I put the Budweiser……by the Bud Light.

To put the Bar in a nutshell: disorganized chaos. From the set up of the bar to the wacky accounting procedures to the touch screen lacking sensitivity, to Green essentially handing me the bar (I’ve never used the ALOHA system on the bar screens), him getting wasted, waiting for him to lock up when he was out smoking weed, that the owner got hammered, that the barback kept disappearing on me…..I shrieked at him actually around 1230 am to STOP MOVING MY FUCKING STRAINERS!

And they use 1.5 oz pours, not 1.25 like I’m used to, and they use measured pourers instead of silver spouts. Ergh.

And I loved it. I ran the bar, I hollered at Green when I needed help, customers love it there and the energy was great, Wednesdays is karaoke and I watched some great breakdancers get down and some wonderful people sing.

It was actually quite awesome. I’m just happy I don’t work there full time.

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About Malachi the Drink Slinger

Finally transferring to that four year school in January, my goals made, my life set, the blinders dropped, my past signed and sealed, my future bright and airy, a writer, a thinker, a feeler, someone who is enthralled by beauty, an artist worth slightly more than two shits, a lover, a fighter, a person on the way to become the person I have always wanted to be....

One comment

  1. A change of pace and scenery is always good!

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